Cold Front
by Pokiepup
Summary: Bo finally learns the difference between what's the best decision and what's the right decision.


A.N. Just a small one shot, I got bored and felt the urge to write and after scrapping two others this is the product. Hope it's decently enjoyable. Have a good day/night guys and thanks for reading.

* * *

**Cold Front**

"Fuck!" she yelled out up into the unnecessarily heavy stream of water pounding down on her like it was some kind of punishment. The pressure so rough and scolding her normally soft, milky skin was beyond tender and a shade of pink that verged on bright red.

Ignoring the pain or rather accepting it with masochistic arms open wide she kept her eyes tightly shut and her head tilted back, after all of her escaping tears to be masked. If she couldn't see them nor hear her tiny sobs under the echoing noise than she didn't have to admit she was crying and if she didn't have to admit she was crying then she didn't have to admit she was hurting.

A flawed logic maybe but it was one that served her well.

She didn't have the strength to admit that she was hurt. That she had felt a pain unlike any other before, one that she heard in songs and seen in movies—all of which she scoffed at and dismissed as a childish, fairytale gimmick to apply to all the hopeless romantics that didn't know love was scientifically proved to be no more than a chemical reaction in the brain and an anthropological need to find someone to satisfy one's needs in one way or another. Yet all the books, knowledge, logic and scientific facts she could quote until pigs learned how to fly, didn't help one bit.

Nope, there wasn't a single fact or excerpt that could make the crushing weight in her chest lessen or the sickness lingering in the pit of her stomach go away. In fact at this moment she couldn't think of anything short of a time machine that would fix this mess.

Opening her mouth she welcomed a mouth full before swooshing the liquid around and then spitting it out hoping it would wash away the taste of disgust both figuratively and literally. Opening her eyes she watched the water circle the drain, brow scrunching as the memory of throwing up came back to the forefront of her mind. It wasn't something new, her having to hold her anger in until the point where it would make her physically sick—she just hadn't cared about something enough in a long time to earn this type of reaction.

Tiring of the repetitive sound of the cascading water she slammed the nozzle in with one hand and pulled the door open with the other. Nearly jumping out of the shower she made quick work of her light gray, running shorts and white, spaghetti strapped tee shirt. A glare firmly planted over her worn features, the choice of bedtime attire a reminder of Bo. This being one of several of the succubus' favorite outfits to rip off, snuggle in and admire. The shirt being so asset emphasizing that it prevented a bra from being worn while the shorts were tight enough and short enough to show off the length of her legs along with the tiny curves she had.

Shaking the thought of the succubus from her mind she turned to the misty mirror. Staring indignantly at her distorted reflection she tried to pull herself together, telling herself that those were remaining drops of water running down her cheeks rather than tears. That her hands were shaking from the change of temperature her body was experiencing rather than the physical toll tonight's events had taken on her. Even with as good of a liar she had become through the years and the aid of a muddled reflection she couldn't hide from the damning truth.

She had been broken tonight—she had finally been broken and there was nothing she could do to change that. No lie was big enough and no corner dark enough to hide from it.

Sighing she ran her hands through her hair, a poor substitute for a brush but then again she didn't care much what she looked like at the moment. After all weren't the brokenhearted supposed to look beaten and broken down. Wasn't that the point?

She snorted at herself for the umpteenth time tonight wondering why she made the choices she had made. It had been a domino effect of one horrible decision after the next that all came crashing down like a flimsy house of cheap cards.

First she handled the whole situation poorly and that was to put it delicately and then she made the situation worse by insulting the succubus and practically ignored every shred of humanity she had within her chilled, science-fied heart and purposefully ignored the succubus' silent pleas for forgiveness—and for mercy. Third, once they had reached a level of calm and forgiveness which instead of trying to move past this she essentially threw the woman out of her house under the ruse of lies—the same issue that had brought about this mess.

Well she hadn't really lied. Not technically. She honestly wasn't feeling well. She felt irritable, hurt, sick, broken and about twenty thousand other things she didn't know how to cope with- but most of all… she was emotionally fragile. And if two things mixed worse than water and vinegar it was Lauren Lewis and being fragile. She could learn to adapt to near anything, except for that. Fragility was one emotion she just couldn't master. Her and fragility was like Pandora's Box, you never knew what you'd get. She could be angry, cold, mean, and vicious all within seconds of each other before switching it up all over again thus why she couldn't risk that being around Bo—not after all that had happened already.

She just wanted to be alone. She needed to be alone. She needed her privacy, needed solitude. Beyond need she craved it, knowing it would provide her a rare freedom to let loose the tumultuous wave of emotions that threatened to shatter her into tiny, unmendable shards.

Unable to face herself any longer the hit the switch and walked into the welcoming darkness of her room. She didn't need the light, all it would do was point out the fact she was there alone.

Curling up at 'her' end of the big, empty bed with her face buried halfway in the pillow that smelled faintly like the succubus. It was a sweet, seductive smell that was engulfing. Engulfing enough to bring the blonde's thoughts out form her pain and into a yearning for the woman.

Letting heavy eyelids get their wish she wondered what Bo was doing this very second. Would she be at the Dal with Kenzi and them? Would she be with him again looking to throw herself in passion to forget the cruel words spoken to her? Would she be sulking at home the way she was doing this instant? Would the succubus be as painfully aware as she was that she wasn't there with her? Would she even care? Would she miss her at all?

Thinking about Bo brought the dual feeling of butterflies and a familiar agony stirring in the pit of her stomach. Her heart ached for her. Her body trembled as she cradled the woman's image within her soul. It was as equal physically painful as it was mentally agonizing. She had wanted Bo so much, yet she would never know it—not after every horrible, hurtful word spoken tonight.

The logical part of herself knew that it could never last, that they could never make it work past the ideals inside their hearts. Actually every part of her knew that-with the exception of her heart. Her heart, refusing to concede, continued to allow the fantasy to flourish and she had done nothing to prevent it. The fantasy that said this unattainable and incredibly unique succubus could one day belong to her, **only** **her,** while denying the all too painful truth that it was a fantasy that would never be attainable.

The tears that were close to the surface since she emerged from the bathroom, tears she normally would never indulge in, now welled up in the corners of sorrowful eyes. This time, she would not stop them or even try, no, now she would simply grant them their desired escape. Seldom one to wallow in her own self-pity, life had given her no choice tonight, so instead of fighting against life or the universe or whatever one would call it, she would accept the hand she was dealt and accept the heartbreak.

The sudden sound of footsteps accompanied by first a sliver of light that quickly grew she shot up worrying that in the mist of her wallowing she had missed a summons from the Ash and they had come to physically make sure she hadn't tried to make an escape in the cover of the night as she had threatened to do.

"I didn't mean-Bo?" she let out confused as she quickly used the back of her hands to wipe away shed tears.

"I'm sorry," she starts walking in from the hall, her voice little more than a whisper. "I had knocked downstairs but you didn't answer,"

"I was sleeping," she lied but knew the succubus wouldn't push the issue, not now.

"I know we said that I should leave. That, that would be the best decision,"

"Mm-hm,"

"But you're wrong—we were wrong," Bo paused swallowing at the dryness in her throat as she took two more baby steps in. "Me leaving and going home so we could both have space and do the responsible thing—well it might be the best decision but it's not the right one,"

"Bo," Lauren says in a sigh as she brings herself to her feet and though she's looking at her face she refuses to meet her gaze.

"I don't want to go to sleep angry—I don't want to go to sleep without you. I don't want you to go to sleep angry at me and I don't want you up all night thinking about all the reasons we are wrong for each other because believe me I know there are a billion,"

"You're right there are," her voice breaks as if she is admitting a defeat.

"Yeah for starters you're a human and I'm a Fae—a succubus. I'm a high school dropout and you have a PHD. I'm emotional and you're logical. I can be immature and run from my problems and you are over logical and sometimes cold. The list is long and I know that if I leave you hurt and angry thinking about this all night then you'll call me tomorrow and tell me that we can't be together and-I don't want that. I can't handle that,"

"Bo you just listed off major problems we have and some of them cannot change, some will never change and with everything that happened tonight-perhaps it's best if we throw in the towel,"

"We have a billion good reasons to do that," with glassy eyes she nodded her head taking another two steps forward so the doctor was within arm's reach. "A billion reasons to throw in the towel and if you were anyone else then I think-no I know I would," hesitantly she reached out taking Lauren's hands in her own, keeping a tight grip as the blonde tried to get away. "But I have one great reason we shouldn't,"

"Wh—what," a soft, trembling whisper escaped her as she forced herself to look up into the brunette's eyes.

"I love you,"

"Bo," it was a sob as she tried to tug her hands away and though Bo allowed it her own hands grabbed the blonde by face and leaned in.

The kiss was rough and forceful even though neither set of lips parted. Sighing out she pulled away just enough to separate their lips. Opening her own eyes she found, tear-filled, deep, dark brown, pleading eyes peering back at her. And for the first time in their relationship she had all the power. For the first time she was the one who decided what happened next. She wasn't just some bystander or victim or a fish stuck following the current, no this time it was all her call-and it was frightening.

In this moment she decided not only her fate but **their** fate. If this would be the end or rather just another bump in the road that was the tremulous journey of them.

This was the second time tonight she had been given this opportunity but for some reason this time seemed more real. This time seemed as though it would be final. They had time to calm, to process, to weigh the ups and downs and now it was decision time only it was all on her.

"Fight for this," Bo whispered stray tears finally slipping as the silence went from a single heartbeat to several, each one passing like a dagger being jammed into the heart of the younger of the pair. She knew this had been all her fault, it was her stupidity, her actions that brought them here and if Lauren was to walk away she couldn't blame her.

"I'm not a fighter," the succubus just let out a whimper at this as she squeezed her eyes shut holding back the approaching waterfall. In reality she knew this fact but just this once she was hoping the woman in front of her would be. Just this once. "I—I'll fight—if you stay,"

Bo opened her eyes a hint of confusion written over her until she realized the context of her side of the ultimatum. She was asking Lauren to go against her own nature and fight and in turn Lauren was asking her to go against her own nature, and to not run away. Her lips parted to answer the second the woman finished speaking but remained silent as she studied the blonde and let the words sink in for a moment.

"Forever,"

"We don't have forever," she gave a weak, sorrowful smile just another tonight that she was merely human. "**I** don't have forever,"

"Lauren, I'm a succubus in a monogamous relationship with a human. I'm a Fae who is unaligned to either side. You think I'm going to let some silly thing like mortality get in the way of us?" she asked through a smile using her thumbs to wipe drying tears away from her girlfriend's cheeks.

"You're crazy,"

"No, I'm in love,"

"It's the same thing," Lauren whispered with her own soft smile knowing the succubus believed wholeheartedly the words she spoke.

Lauren knew that her life span exceeding past another twenty years while keeping the succubus was another fantasy perhaps bigger than the last but it was a nice one. And after all what was the problem in indulging in it even if just for a little while?


End file.
